As part of the 2019 GoodReads Reading Challenge, Where’d You Go, Bernadette was the third book that I completed. The book is by Maria Semple, and this is the second book that I’ve read by this author. Where’d You Go, Bernadette tells the story of an architectural genius that pretty much loses her spark. The story is told from the viewpoint of her daughter Bee and is detailed through a series of emails, instant messages, and even a police report. It’s a unique story with a lot of layers and I definitely recommend it for your book club, or for a quick beach read as the story moves fast. It is also being turned into a movie, which is set to premiere on March 22nd.
There is a discussion guide at the end of the book, and here are my answers.
Discussion Questions
1. Where’d You Go, Bernadette is told from the point of view of a daughter trying to find her missing mother. Why do you think the author chose to tell the story from Bee’s perspective? What light does it shed on the bond between Bernadette and Bee?
I think the author chose to tell the story from Bee’s perspective so that we could truly feel what it’s like to be abandoned. Bernadette also left her husband behind, but her husband was someone she chose to be with. Bernadette gave birth to Bee after several miscarriages and the author touched on the closeness of their relationship many times in the book. When Bernadette leaves, and Bee is in boarding school, it shows the reader that their bond has evolved to the point where they are no longer dependent upon each other and can reflect on the impact that the other person has had on their life thus far.
2. What are your thoughts on Bernadette’s character? Has she become unhinged or has she always been a little crazy? What, if anything, do you think sent her over the edge? Have you ever had a moment in your own life that utterly changed you, or made you call into question your own sanity?
Initially, I thought Bernadette was suffering through a prolonged period of postpartum depression after the author revealed her miscarriages. But after reading more about her career, she just appears to be a creative person that is incredibly passionate about her craft. The destruction of the Twenty Mile House -which was partially her own fault – set her over the edge. The Twenty Mile House was something that she put so much time and effort into and was ultimately destroyed because of her determination to be petty and to have the last laugh. Fortunately, I haven’t had a moment in my life that made me question my own sanity, but I have questioned the sanity of others since November 8, 2016.
3. When Bernadette relocates from Los Angeles to Seattle, she must cope with being a transplant in a new city. Have you ever moved, or even stayed put but switched jobs, and had to adjust to an entirely different culture? What was it like?
Moving from Philadelphia to Atlanta at age 18, then from Atlanta to Chicago at age 22 was life-changing. Atlanta wasn’t too bad – I was in close proximity to my family, and I also had friends from high school to lean on. Moving from Atlanta to Chicago was a little different. I only knew a couple of people, and I had only visited the city twice. I had to re-adjust to the cold shoulder of the Midwest and had to learn to depend on myself since I didn’t have the crutch of friends and family close by. I can say that I landed on my feet since I’m still here 13 years later.
4. The idea of going to Antarctica becomes too much for an already frazzled Bernadette to bear, but the trip itself, surprisingly, turns out to be exactly what she needs to get back on track. How do other characters in the novel experience their own breakthroughs? Which character is most transformed?
In addition to Bernadette being transformed, I think that her neighbor Audrey was transformed as well. She was in complete denial about her son and husband’s issues with drug abuse. Finally seeing the issue firsthand, she was determined to change her life and her role in Bernadette’s demise.
5. How are Audrey Griffin and Bernadette Fox more alike than they realize?
Audrey and Bernadette are very alike because they are both in denial about their lives. Audrey is in denial about the addictions of her family, and Bernadette is in denial about the state of her life and her home. Fortunately, being next-door neighbors helps them turn their lives around due to an unfortunate event that affects their whole community.
6. Bernadette often behaves as if she is an outsider. Do you think she is? If so, do you think her feelings of being an outsider are self-imposed, or is she truly different from the other members of her community? Do you ever feel like an outsider?
As a consequence of being a creative person, Bernadette’s feelings of being an insider are self-imposed. She feels as though no one understands her because she sees the world differently, and eventually takes on the idea that everyone is inferior. Being awarded the MacArthur Grant helped to fuel this complex and being an outsider starts to take over her life. She is not active in Bee’s school, her house is literally falling apart even though she received the Genius Grant for architecture, and she attempted to have her wisdom teeth removed so that she could avoid a family trip. Bernadette has unknowingly created a bubble for herself and views others as a threat when confronted about it.
7. The book has a very playful structure. Do you think it works? Why do you think the author chose it rather than a more straightforward, traditional structure? Think about other books with unusual structures and how their formats influenced your reading experience.
The collection of emails, notes, instant messages, police reports, etc. adds to the quirkiness of the story. The unusual format lets the reader know that the story in itself will be unusual. It also helps create a clearer view of each narrator and setting.
8. What do you think of Bernadette and Elgie’s marriage? Is it dysfunctional? Is there real love there? How has their marriage changed over time? Think about romantic relationships you’ve been in that have evolved, positively or negatively, and why.
I think that Bernadette and Elgie did love one another at one point. Their relationship suffered a series of unfortunate events that took a toll on them and they transformed into survival mode. Elgie was trying to keep his family together as he became the sole financial provider, and Bernadette was just trying to keep herself together enough to go outside.
9. Where’d You Go, Bernadette is, at its core, a story about a woman who disappears, both literally and figuratively. Were you able to relate to the book? How and why? Do you feel Bernadette’s disappearance was unique, or do all women, in a sense, disappear into motherhood and marriage?
Bernadette’s disappearance was not unique in my opinion. I think different parts of women disappear as they enter different stages in their lives. Once the Twenty Mile house was destroyed, she physically disappeared from Los Angeles and the creative side of Bernadette disappeared. She literally let her surroundings crumble around her, and once she was confronted about her lack of presence in her loved ones' lives, she disappeared again. The good part about Bernadette is that she was able to appear again. Disappearing helped Bernadette find herself. Something about Antarctica sparked her creativity and she was able to get back on track.